The Search

I looked for my underwear, high and low,
A piece of clothing, to wear below;
Even as I stood there –detesting! –standing in the nude,
I failed to find the undergarment to which I allude!

I looked here, I searched yonder,
I inspected the clothes kept to a-launder;
I groped hither, I explored thither
-‘Where art my briefs?! Or have they gone a-wither?!’

With closet doors pulled open wide,
‘Succeed I must! ’, did I decide;
Rummaging through belongings, pulling out clothes,
Finding, among other things, moth balls and sticky notes.

‘Where might they have gone?’ I cerebrated,
With my honour on the verge of being desecrated;
While my veins throbbed, distended with panicky blood,
A million thoughts did my encephalon a-flood.

With modesty compromised and nothing to wear,
I cried out in frustration –sheer despair:
‘Whom did I wrong, where have I sinned,
What misdemeanour has I, to my name a-pinned?’

Sat I brooding under the shadow of shame,
Overwhelmed by the numbness of emotion that came;
Overhead did dark clouds of embarrassment loom,
As I lay vanquished, in my endeavour to find that costume.

Even as I lay struggling, writhing amidst turmoil,
Denigrating the circumstances, to which fate had played foil,
Out of the corner of my iris I happened to spy –
‘Oh, my! ...Is it true? …Can I believe my eye?’

There, in the corner of my dog’s kennel,
Wide-eyed, I ogled au view novel;
A white piece of fabric, with only corner jutting out,
‘So this is where my underpants have established their hideout.’

Further examination revealed the entire stash,
Among the pilfered stuff was, ‘…a tray of cigarette ash?!’
And horded in a corner, lay my underwear in a small heap,
With Tootsie, sprawled upon it, fast asleep.

What’s up with this mongrel of complexion so wheatish?
Of all things to have …an ‘underwear’ fetish?
Reason eludes me to explain this conniving rogue
Maybe in ‘Doggy land’, such is the practice in vogue.

I shook awake the beast canine,
And appropriated what was rightfully mine;
A mystery it remains, how he managed to get it all there,
But ecstatic with joy I exclaimed, ‘Oh, what do I care!